George Clooney Is a Bachelor, Kim Kardashian Is a Spinster

It’s official. As Kim Kardashian approaches her 30th birthday in October, she is joining the ranks of women such as Jennifer Aniston and Jessica Simpson: modern-day spinsters. There’s no comparable expression for men, such as 49-year-old unmarried George Clooney, who has traipsed around the globe parading a rotating bevvy of babes. Oh wait, he’s a bachelor.

As Jessica Valenti writes in He’s a Stud, She’s a Slut, and 49 Other Double-Standards Every Woman Should Know:

They’re bachelors, with cool apartments and the freedom to do whatever they want without judgment. Sure, they may catch occasional shit from their mother about “finding the right girl,” but for the most part they’re respected. Single women, on the other hand–especially single women who have the gall to be over thirty–we’re old maids. Spinsters. Desperate to be Bridezillas and moms. There’s no such thing as a happy single  woman. We’re all just wives-in-training or crazy cat ladies. There’s something about unmarried women that society just doesn’t like. That’s why the media is constantly telling us how miserable single women are.

Like celebutante-turned-mega-brand Kardashian. In addition to the standard hoopla about the reality star’s cleavage, her famous curves or her appearance at a variety of red-carpet events, the media has increasingly honed in on her personal status, which mere months ago when from “in a relationship” to “single” after she and football star Reggie Bush called off their on-again, off-again relationship.

Take last month’s group chat with George Lopez (sitting in for Larry King) with most of the major players in the Kardashian-Jenner clan. Naturally, most of the interview questions were directed at Kim, and they kept swinging back to her single status. Lopez made comparisons to Kim’s sisters– Khloe, who married Lakers star Lamar Odom, and Kourtney, who recent gave birth to a child–hoping that she’d admit pangs of jealousy. Is it weird to be the only unattached sister? Is she lonely? Didn’t she think she’d be married by now? Did she want to get married? Blah, blah, blah.

Since ex-husband Brad Pitt paired up with Angelina Jolie, Jennifer Aniston has also been painted as the unlucky-in-love, pathetic-ex envious of Jolie’s fecundity and subsequent hold on Brad. Similarly, following Jessica Simpson’s divorce and subsequent failed relationships, tabloid stories focused on her supposed jealousy of sister Ashlee’s marriage, baby and sleek physique.

In the interview with Lopez, Kardashian didn’t take the bait. She said that while she imagined herself married with children by 30–and still wants that someday–her single status has given her the ability to achieve things she dreamed of. Still, Kardashian is not framed as an powerful, independent woman able to make conscious decisions about her own life, but as desperate and unable to make wise choices. There must be something wrong with a woman if she’s over 30 and single.

Interestingly enough, Kardashian, Aniston and Simpson have all been previously married. Given this, one would logically assume, as my friend Theresa puts it, that “you can’t go back to being a spinster, just like you can’t go back to being a virgin.” Well, apparently, in our culture you can do both. Meanwhile, eternal bachelor George Clooney goes about his single-man business with few questions–because he’s independent, she’s pathetic.

While I have been quite vocal about my issues with Kardashian’s rise to fame, her incessant focus on her body and her mixed message of empowerment while hawking diet pills and seeking cosmetic surgery, I don’t condone the media’s increasing focus on her relationship status and the countless double-standards contained therein. Despite women’s increasing numbers in education and the work force, women are still viewed as “naturally” interested in relationships, especially the heterosexual kind that culminate in marriage and children. Ultimately he’s gonna be a success, she’s gonna be a stay-at-home-mom. In fact, Kim’s focus on her work is presented as one of the major obstacles to finding true love.

Kim’s “pickiness” is also cited as a detriment to obtaining the picture-perfect fairytale romance. If she didn’t set the bar so high, she might finally find a mate. I don’t hear anyone chastising “hot guys” for only dating “hot women. ” There’s a big, fat double-standard when it comes to physical attractiveness and gender. I mean, really, when do men “date down”? Why should Kim have to settle?

I don’t tout Kim as a feminist role model, I don’t think her decision to remain single and focus on her career is a political statement and I don’t see her pointing out the double-standards–but I’m happy to do so.

Photos of Kim Kardashian and a waxy George Clooney from Flickr.com users Kalumba2009 and cliff1066 through Creative Commons License 2.0

Comments

  1. We have to to thank Hugh Hefner for making it okay to be an unmarried man. Before him men also carrieda stigma for being unmarried and childless at 30. Now,single men are not only seens at bachelors but as playboys.

  2. Mirian Merino says:

    There is nothing wrong with a 30 year old successful women not being married. Kim Kardashian is probably happier being single than a miserable married woman. I thought that women had the right to be educated and successful. There shouldn’t be an age limit on how old you should be to get married and settle down.

  3. Celebrities such as Kim Kardashian and Jennifer Aniston have been criticized for not settling down and finding the “one” now that they are over the age of thirty. Women are expected to marry and create a family before they reach the “old” age of thirty while middle-aged men like George Clooney remain bachelors until any age they desire. True love is not something that could be given a time limit, however in order to be accepted in society women should get married before they reach their thirties. It’s important to find a partner, who you feel comfortable with and truly love in order to have a successful marriage, however for women their age plays a key factor in when they get married. Single women are considered to be “unhappy” and a single marital status is frowned upon in our society. However, I support single women such as Oprah Winfrey who take advantage of their singe status and pursue their dreams. Oprah Winfry choose to remain single and not to have children in order to pursue a successful future as a talk show host. I find her commitment to her dreams and her confidence in her single status inspiring. Single women should embrace their freedom of independence instead of focusing on their age and marital status.

  4. Camille Yona says:

    As an 18 year old girl and frequent watcher of “Keeping Up With the Kardashians,” I am very familiar with Kim Kardashian and this prevailing issue of “being single.” Though this article was published prior to Kim’s short-lived marriage to Kris Humphries, the main points it illustrates remain true for nearly every unmarried woman in her 30s and even sometimes in her late 20s. From personal experience that I have observed through family members, it is looked down upon in our society and culture to be single when a women should be on the search for a husband and potential father to the children she is expected to have. It is very sad to admit to this double-standard as I, myself, am a women, leading this double-standard to apply to me too. I know that I would be very frustrated if our culture tried to impose pressures on me to be married and have children if I was enjoying my life as a single woman and didn’t see the necessity in getting married. Therefore, I sympathize for women such as Kim who receive such media attention while her male counter-parts are condoned and accepted as single and happy.

  5. I have actually contemplated about this prior to reading this blog. It is rather unfair to look up to a single man and scoff a single woman. I deem that it all goes back to the stereotype about women being dependent on a man to be fulfilled. It all goes back to how women have been treated for years. Women used to be only good for the domestic work, they couldn’t get an education, they were not supposed to work, they were not allowed to have their own bank accounts. Everything was controlled by men and a woman was considered insane and out off her mind if she didn’t want to get married. Back in the days, an unmarried woman was considered insane. It was very prevalent for women to be married and not pursue a career. Even if things have been altered through the years and you see a lot of women pursuing a career and not getting married, it is still looked down on to be an unmarried woman in her thirties. Nevertheless, I do not agree with that. I deem that women who stay unmarried are independent a strong and I look up to them. I deem that a woman doesn’t need a man to fulfill her or to depend on. A woman can be happy without a man in her life. I think it is unfair to favor a man being single and bringing him up as opposed to a woman being single. There is nothing wrong with wanting to stay single and not get married, there is no rule that tells you to get married. Just because it is what we are accustomed to does not mean that that is the right thing to do. If you are a single woman and happy then why change it. Women should get married because they want to, not because they feel obligated to. As for Kim Kardashian, if she is happy with the way things are then why question it and compare her to her sisters who chose to get married? Marriage is about choice, not force. It is sad that people still consider the woman as the inferior gender, and without knowing they are still favoring men in society.

  6. Eun Hee Chung says:

    I think marriage is not important for life, and marriage is not the whole in life. We could be happy without husband. Also, women’s age of over 30 is not too old at this time because many women have their own job and ability of financial with their own. Also, there is nothing wrong with old women successful not being married. This is great article and good pointed.

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  7. I have to say I’ve never actually heard the word “spinster” used to describe Kim Kardashian, although I’ve heard her called much worse. I do think that a lot of the pressure Kim felt to be married by 30 was self directed, as on the show she mentioned over and over about how it was her lifelong plan to be married and to have kids when she was 30. In her quest to achieve that goal she ended up marrying Kris Humphries and we all know how that ended. I think we would all much rather Kim stay single than watch her fake her way through another marriage just so that she can drive up ratings and fulfill a silly childhood goal of hers.

  8. One of my biggest pet peeves in the media is the portrayal of Jennifer Aniston – especially when you compare her to her male peers such as George Clooney or in reference to Brad Pitt. When Jennifer and Brad were together they were Hollywood’s golden couple. They were beautiful, seemed happy, and were living the life everyone dreamed of. After their divorce, Brad immediately got with “homewrecker” Angelina Jolie (as though Brad’s decisions had nothing to do with the demise of their relationship), and Jennifer opted to live her life without stressing over a male companion.

    This lifestyle, though, seems utterly unacceptable and unfathomable to the general public. Any time Jen is seen with a male we automatically assume they must be dating. Any time she’s spotted out alone we imagine she must be miserable and lonely. I almost have to laugh every time I see them talk about her donning a “brave face in spite of her loneliness” as she blissfully paddle boards through the blue Malibu waters. Nobody seems more strong and happy in their independence yet we choose to depict her as this poor victim left miserable and alone with no love. Because a woman on her own couldn’t possibly be happy. The double standard between Jennifer Aniston and her male counterparts are outdated and ridiculous.

  9. Lauren B says:

    It wasn’t until I read this article that I realized how influenced by the media I am. Just one year ago I was watching an episode of Keeping Up with the Kardashians and thinking to myself “Oh, Poor Kim. She just can’t seem to get married, can she?” Then by last August she was married, and I thought “well that’s that.” The divorce came along, the Media was in uproar, and my instant reaction was, “what a spoiled bitch. She can’t just be a normal person and deal with a not-so-perfect marriage.” After watching the break-up on TV and reading this article, I finally understand. All women think this way. It’s not just the celebrities, all women are on a desperate search for a husband. And sometimes that search gets really desperate. So they marry the first decent guy that shows and interest for marriage. Then get divorced. This happens all the time in the media, and happens over and over again in real life too. Then after the divorce the ex-husband is a bachelor again and the ex-wife is back on the hunt for another decent guy to marry. And divorce.

  10. Jasmine Y. says:

    I think the media should give Kim Kardashian a break. It is very clear that she hopes to be married, but it is also clear to me that she wants to continue working and doesn’t plan to slow down anytime soon. I don’t think that there is anything wrong with that – the media glorifies celebrity women today who give up their careers after marriage and kids, but pities them for being single at 30 after numerous divorces but who are still successful business women. To have to deal with a divorce that is public, constantly in the tabloids and media puts a lot more pressure and stress on someone who just wants to look for love.

    Kim Kardashian is scrutinized for not having found a husband, while George Clooney is fawned over for being single at the age of 49. This double standard needs to be reevaluated.

  11. This double standard really needs to end. What nonsense. The media can say whatever it is that they want to say, because lets face it, they always do in the end. I just hope that the real women who just turned 30 and are still not married and single do not fall in this trap. Women can be independent and happy all on their own. They don’t need a man to support them or tell them that their beautiful everyday. I’m so tired of hearing this talk about how a woman needs to get married before 30 but men are free to get married later because they haven’t “matured” enough yet. Yes, there is a biological aspect to this, women need to get married earlier so they could have children. But hey, who said every woman wants to have children?

  12. In my opinion, everyone’s date life should be up to them, regardless of gender. I do see a double standard in the dating life of men and women. The first is that other men see a man who dates many women with respect and he is known as a “player”, while a woman who dates many men is considered “easy” and is not seen with respect. The other double standard, which is illustrated in the article, is how women are shown to be insecure and lonely when they don’t have a man in their lives, while men are shown to be dominant and independent when they do not have a woman in their lives. Why can’t an unmarried woman be seen as independent? If anything, a woman who does not need a single man in her life is very independent. Moreover, during the first and second waves of feminism women who didn’t get married were trying to make a point that they did not need the support of a man in their lives. I think the examples used in the article were great, because George Clooney is shown with a lot of respect and envy, while the public constantly criticizes Kim Kardashian. Although, I think there needs to be a female icon in the media, such as a celebrity, who steps up and points out these double standards.

  13. Alina Bergelson says:

    Now this is a very interesting perspective. I never realized that this is such a huge double standard. Men can be bachelors until their 50′s yet women have to be married with children by 35. It is sad to say but this is the way society views men and women in relationships. But this is not the only double standard placed against men and women. If you want to go a little further, men can sleep with hundreds of women and be praised while women will be looked down on and called whores. It seems quite unfair that women should be subjected to such criticism when their male counterparts can perform the same activities and be hailed a king. Getting back to the real issue, I believe it is also unfair that people believe Kim should lower her standards so she could find a man already. Men never lower their standards, especially attractive men, so why should an attractive women lower her standards? There are so many double standards in our society targeting women, that it is simply disgusting.

  14. Chantelle A. says:

    This article is so so so so true! I am only eighteen years old and already my mom is yelling at me for not dating for marriage. but, my brother on the other hand, which is 5 years older than me never gets any advice from my parents. instead they condone him for having fun and getting with a variety of women. another thing i have noticed is that it is totally okay for the man to be a “man-whore”, if anything that word is a compliment. guys who get with multiple women are known to be legendary and every other guy’s role model. but if a women ever did half of the things men did, they would automatically fall under the “slut” category and be crossed off the “marriage-material list.” double-standards suck and it just reflects on the patriarchial society we live in. i believe that we should kick double-standards out of the window!!

  15. Julianne Insogna says:

    It is true that when older individuals are single, depending on what sex you are determines how people will judge you. For the most part, men are rarely ever harshly judged for being single at an old age. Instead, it is almost as if they are praised. They are called stud, player, ladies’ man, hunk, etc. On the other hand, females are repeatedly looked down upon if they are in their late twenties and still single. People think there must be something wrong with them and call them names such as: cat lady, spinster, cougar, etc. The names that are used to describe single females have a much more negative connotation than the names that describe single men. For some reason, the media has this idea that all women want to be married, have kids, and have a family. They have installed this idea that not only do all women want this, but if they don’t have it, there must be something wrong with them. The media has also portrayed this image that men are much more independent, making it completely acceptable for men not to be married. The media fails to acknowledge that some female may choose to be single because they too are independent and have many dreams and aspirations that they are working to achieve. When it comes to physical attractiveness and gender, there is a very obvious, existing double standard. It seems as if women are seen as subservient human beings who needs a man to make her strong and powerful.

  16. Holly A. says:

    My sister is almost 30, not married (no kids), and yes, she is looked down upon greatly for this reason. Especially being a part of the Persian community, she is seen as a spinster. She has also been described as bitter, picky, incapable… a whole list of nasty words, only because she is 30 and unmarried. On the other hand, my brother who is 32 (and who dates a new girl almost every week)is seen as a young bachelor. “He’s having fun!”, my mother says. I have to admit I think this whole double standard is truly disgusting. Why? because pretty soon I’ll be 20, and in the words of my family “just ripe for marriage”. NO. Not only does it really scare me, but I am torn. What if I don’t want to get married so soon? I want to finish school before anything, but I know the longer I wait the more ridicule I must face. Sadly, I’ll be seen as an old spinster. It’s like a woman’s whole life should revolve around getting married and making babies, but it really should NOT be that way.

  17. Nicole D says:

    I have always wondered why single women over thirty are condemned while single men over thirty are definitely not. Although I am very familiar with George Clooney and Kim Kardashian, I have never thought about this double standard as made clear in this article. No one ever asks what is wrong with George Clooney for not being married, they simply think it is just the way he likes to live his life. However, Kim Kardashian is always asked in the media about her single status. Although Kim Kardashian has been married twice, the second time for only 72 days, she is still ridiculed for being single for so long. I have seen in my own family and surroundings that is seen as horrible to be a single woman over thirty. I have been told from a young age that I should be married by the time I am thirty, or preferably even earlier. This puts a large amount of pressure on me, and I know that many other women are under the same pressure. I do not understand why women are not considered independent if they are unmarried at thirty, but unmarried men at the same men are called independent. Some people say that the reason there is a greater emphasis on women to get married younger is that their biological clock is ticking, but I find this excuse pathetic and illegitimate. The reality is that our culture is sexist and there are so many double standards in our society; a woman who sleeps with many men is called a slut, while a man who sleeps with many women is called a stud. This is very offensive to all women.

  18. Melody S. says:

    Double standards have been socially constructed and carried out since the beginning of time. Anything that is abhorred for the woman is championed for the man. A guy who sleeps with a lot of girls is a “legend” and a player but a girl who does the same is a “whore” and a “slut”. There’s almost no way for a woman to win in the eyes of society. If she’s incredibly successful and has a great career everybody still questions her if she is single and urges her to get married because somehow she is seen as incomplete to society. She can’t seriously be happy without a man. For some reason our society believes marriage is the answer to a woman’s problems and that it will bring her eternal happiness. Really? If this is the case then why do we have a national divorce rate of 50%? It seems like marriage is like a tossing a coin and having a 50/50 chance of having a happy marriage. It is indeed a gamble.

  19. Giselle A. says:

    I remember reading this article almost two years ago and being very surprised on what I had learned. Even after reading it now, I still am shocked and amazed on how society uses this double standard amongst men and women. Many celebrity women who are above the age of 25 seem to be looked down upon if they are not married or not in a stable relationship. It seems that that is the only subject the media wants comment on, rather than the woman’s accomplishments in her career. Instead, the interviews on late night talk shows and red carpet events consist of whom she may be dating and if she has found “the one.” On the other hand, men such as George Clooney and Leonardo Dicaprio are known as bachelors. They are praised for dating numerous models and having a new girlfriend every few months. It is not fair that these double standards are present in society, because it just upholds stereotype characteristics of how men and women should act. Personally, I don’t feel that I will be getting married at a young age, because I want to finish my education and establish my career. My mother was married at the age of 23 and that seems normative in a Filipino culture. I do not want to be looked down on, if I choose to stay single until I am 25 or older. It is unfortunate that society has to be this way, and I feel that if we educate young girls about making their own decisions and gender socialization, it will help them in the future.

  20. Ryan F. says:

    The double standard of the male bachelor and the female spinster are quite prevalent in the Hollywood industry. George Clooney, or the eternal bachelor, is an icon for his single-ness and is praised for his independence and serial monogamy. However as stated above, comparable serial monogamist, Kim Kardashian, is demeaned in the media for her relationship status and questioned about her happiness. Why is it that being single means mandatory unhappiness? Is there a handbook I am unaware of that states if you are single, you and damned to unhappiness until you find a man? Of course this handbook only applies to unmarried women, because a single man is a hot commodity in today’s society, especially in Hollywood. However, it seems the ‘world’s’ fascination with these forever single females is more selfish than anything. I read an article in Cosmo magazine that said many women are interested in hearing about these single (successful) women finally finding love gives them hope for the future. As if seeing these mildly fictional women on the red carpet achieving what the world perceives to be the ultimate goal (marriage) means that one day you too will find love. Why is this culture so obsessed with finding love? Most of the time, especially in Hollywood, this eternal love is not so eternal. Like good old Kim K. I believe her wedding ceremony was longer than her actual marriage. However, many women were captivated by her romance, and the bridezilla aspect to it. Women are validating their hopes within semi-fictional romances that destined to make a quick buck then fail miserably to ensure a fat paycheck for both ex-bride and ex-groom. We must stop labeling these spinsters as hopeless and loveless, because there is a ton that can go wrong with love and romance. Hence the tragic and ever anticipated break up of Kim K. and Kris Humphries.

  21. yessica pastor says:

    I never noticed this type of double standard. I am starting to believe that there is double standards with everything women and men do. These are just more ways to oppress women, new ways to make females feel guilty. I have watched some of the episodes of Kim’s reality TV show. She has made her life off her body and it can be said that she probably promotes patriarchy. Yet, I will agree that a man won’t get as much attention about not being married than woman do. Reading this reminded me of my family. If a women is over 25 and isn’t in a serious relationship, that has all the signals of marriage, she is pressured and martyrized. Sometimes this may cause women to get married with someone they don’t truly love. They feel like their clock is ticking. This might explain why Kim married Kris Humphries and then divorced him after only two months. She wasn’t truly committed to him. I never really put much thought into this idea. Why can’t a woman be celebrated for being single and empowered? More and more girls feel they MUST get married and must do it early, when they are young and still desired. This might explain the astonishing number of divorces. Luckily women can resort to divorces because there was a point when women were stuck in a marriage even if they were unhappy.

  22. Mary Marrone says:

    Wow…big deal, Kim’s 30 and single who cares? At least she can say she has a career and has plenty of money. These types of articles are so annoying, they express a degree of jealousy. But I will admit that the mention of the double standard is true. Sadly, there will always be that double standard, unless parents,society, and/or media can change one’s thinking at a young age. We need to instill a new set of values and morals into the next generations instead of polluted thinking.

  23. Pauline T says:

    I have always wondered why is was okay for men to go out with women as much as they wanted, even date a couple of them at the same times, but it was not okay for women to do the same. This is where the double standard comes in. Men are envied by other men for having numerous intimate relationships, but women give other women the bad eye and talk about them behind their back if they have multiple relationships as well. No one ever questions men for being 30 and not married, yet think there are a million things wrong with a woman if she is 30 and not married. There is so much pressure put on women to get married and have kids, but men can never get married in their lifetime and are never questioned about it. We live in a sexist society where they make women feel as though they need to get married at a young age.

  24. I’ve always found it funny that men who date several women are the “real” man, but women who date many men are called sluts, whores, skanks, etc. Now that I think about it, this double standard is more than ridiculous. I mean who says we can’t go out, meet new people, experience the world before finally settling down? Why is there such a difference for men and women? The answer is patriarchy. The system has created such a double standard in which men and women in the same scenario, men always turn out the victors, and women, the losers. Patriarchy views the ideal women as a housewife cleaning the house and tending to the kids. But women who don’t abide by this standard and decide to further pursue their education and not get married, this directly threatens the system. As a result, this double standard is created so as to act as a hurdle for women nearing or surpassing the age of 30 and remaining single. In addition, if a man remains single, then they say that he hasn’t found his Mrs. Right yet. However, for women, they say somethings wrong with her, why can’t she find a guy? This double standard always attacks women and leave men as the victors.

  25. Elyzabeth A says:

    I am single and I am happy. I don’t know why media has to say that all single women are unhappy. I also don’t understand why media has to be focusing on how a 30 year old woman, such as Kim, is single. It’s her decision if she wanted to stay single. Just like her sisters Khloes and Kourtney’s, made their own decision, Kim can make her own decision as well. There was nothing wrong with Kim being single. She knows when will be the perfect time to settle down. She is not a teenage girl no more. It’s sad to realize that even today, it’s still important to see women settle down. It’s sad to see that if media sees you that you are 30 and single, then something is wrong with you. It must be a very hard obstacle to face if you’re a female celebrity and single that hasn’t settles down, or in other words, married.

  26. I think marrige is not important in the life. I believe that important thing is women have choices to life. Kim Kardashian could make choice to be single. She is successful woman. I don’t say marrige is bad or good.It is one of a choice of life. Women should be independent to support yourself. I don’t think young lady should get marry if they need a hasband to live. They are not ready for that.

  27. Amanda A. says:

    I feel like alot of people have experience a double standard, so I don’t understand why they are still so popular. I think if we have experience it we will be able to change the way we think of those standards because we have experience those negative experience of being judged. Women can be single and happy, just people we are not in a relationship doesn’t mean we are miserable. Patriarchy is really engraved in our society and and I feel is enforce to our minds once we are able to understand our surroundings.

  28. Marissa P says:

    Everyone was complaining and wondering when Kim Kardashian was going to get married, to who, when, the wedding, blah blah blah. Her age, sex appleal, and monetary standing was called into question (and the main topic on every annoying gossip TV show). But when she finally did get married, it lasted only 2 months.She also received backlash for that. Although I do not agree with how Kim represents herself or women in general, it seems like it was a lose lose situtation for her. She was going to get ridiculed for not being married and once she was, her man was called into question, and her divorce was also ridiculed. She wasnt going to please anyone and the media ate this up.

    But then we have George Clooney who has a visual history for picking younger and beautiful women and not settling down. He is seen as a stud, handsome, accomplished, and always having the perfect eye candy. Why is it that a man much older who seeks out beautiful women and doesnt have the pressure of marriage is seen as a bachelor and it deemed acceptable. Where Kim who just turned 30 is facing all the pressure of marriage, finding the right man, and popping out kids?

    The double standard for men and women will always exist. Women who sleep with 1 guy, 2 guys, 5 guys, 100 guys, or no guys at all are called sluts, loose, whore, and bitches. But its ok for men to sleep with as many women as they wish for they are pimps, bachelors, and studs.

    It is unfortunate that our patriarchial society accepts one and shames the other. The media shows, as this article states, the a main reason that Kim has a hard time in relaitonships is because she work driven (which only exemplifies the patriarchial view that working women cant find love or a man). But George Cloonely can do both: be a successful actor and activist and have a beautiful womna half his age under his arm.

  29. Richard L says:

    I had a friend, who in high school was in a previous 2 and a half year relationship that had found someone who she believed was “the one”. This was her second boyfriend as a 17 year old, and her boyfriend had many girlfriends before hand. I remember one day in school, girls and guys would speak about her as if she was trash and a person who just jumped from guy to guy. The male never received any criticism, and was basically worshiped by other male peers as a divine being that had been in a relationship with every hot girl out there.

    I always saw this as unfair, that there were double standards between men and women, and such opposite feedback they’d receive for doing essentially the same things. To my guilt though, i was no better than the people who scolded her because i just sat there listening, even though i knew that the things they were saying were untrue.

  30. Jemal H says:

    i believe this problem occurs because as children we are taught by the media that girls have to grow up and find there princess and if they do not there are going to be end up old alone and a witch. And boys on the other hand are taught to not focus on finding a wife, but only on making money. And as more men are exposed to the Hugh Hefner mentality they learn that the world doesn’t look bad on them for not getting married. Causing this double standard that could only resolved when patriarchy in the world goes away.

  31. Ashley-Marie M. says:

    There is a huge double standard for men and women. little girls are being taught at a young age by the media to be motherly and wait for prince charming. there are no power position in the barbie collection just sterotypical ones. when women have a powerful career they are portrayed as someone who is longing for a loving relationship. its sad that we are told we can have it all but the sad truth is that we live in a patriarchal society that will always hinder us.

  32. Chulhyun A says:

    It just shows the side of our society of double-standard. Its very Ironic that there is no word for those men who dont get married yet when they over age 30. But this example is only limited to the US because some country where the marriage is something that must to do, like my country, South Korea.
    But still, even our country has the ‘vocabulary’ for non-married over 30 men, women who dont married always get negative images from our society. They are considered to feminist, workaholic, iron-maden, and men-hater.

    Just what I realized after read post is that feminism cannot go forward unless the media get changed.
    Media is now being a root of patriarchy, and they are still scratching women by their power. both men and women has the right to have their own life alone if they want. Just media makes one of them as gentlemen, and others as spinsters.

  33. Brandon says:

    There is a clear double standard when it comes to men and women and their relationship status. There is tremendous pressure on women in Hollywood to get married and have children while still remaining impossibly desireable and in the same token men in Hollywood are pressured to be playboys who date beautiful models. I think a lot of women are choosing to remain single, especially when they are in the spotlight, because it’s says that there is more to them than marriage and children…that they can be focused on their careers as opposed to getting Brad Pitt to finally pop the question.

  34. This is a huge double standard in todays society. Growing up i was taught that men are okay to have multiple girl friends but if a women did it was not okay, and she would be considered a “slut” or “whore”. I grew up thinking that women should only be one or two people in her entire life because thats how it should be and not the other way around. I remember during high school I would applaud my guy friends whenever he got with a new girl, but i would look down on my friends that were girls who would constantly be in a relationship right after they broke up. I always thought of them as a “slut” or “whore” and that they were not the type of girls that you take to your parents. I believe these ideals were because of what i saw in mainstream society.

  35. Rashidah I says:

    Dating in today’s society is a big double standard. I believe this is also a branch of gender socialization. I myself believed that a woman is only meant to be have sexual relations with the man she will marry and that going (too) far with any other man is deplorable. My views have drastically changed and I no longer support the dating “norms” for women and men. All genders should be able to date freely and be in total control of their personal lives, irrespective of what society says is right and wrong.

  36. Jennifer H. says:

    That is such a double standard. Its ridiculous. Its just like men get applauded if they have more than one girlfriend but if a woman were to have different partners she is considered a whore. Everyone should be able to choose what they want to do with their lives without getting harassed about it. If a woman chooses to be a successful woman rather than a housewife she shouldn’t be questioned about that. Its her life and her decisions and i believe no one has the right to judge her or anyone else.

  37. It is interesting to see how much of a double standard there is in our society. Growing up i learned that the girls that went out with many guy were known as “sluts” and the guys that went out with many girls were simpliy known as “players”. Even in most movies guys are applauded for going out with many girls but when a girl does it she is looked down upon. This ad talks about how celebrities such as kim kardashian have been divorced and they are seen as pathetic but george clooney who has also been divorced is seen as an independent man. I don’t understand why men can go out with different women but when a woman goes out with different men she is known as a slut its the same thing the only difference is that the genders are reversed.

  38. I have to admit there is a double standard in our society and the media just feeds us with it. It is funny when I talk about it with guys I know because people ask why George Clooney is still not married, quickly after my friends say why should he get married he is living the life going from girl to girl. When I hear about Kim Kardashion it is always about her body and how she is just a mess that she cannot find a guy. It is always negative comments towards Kim when I hear about her in the media. It must be really hard for women in the entertainment world because they are in the spot light always getting judged by people and I bet it is hard to handle it every day.

  39. Alexander A says:

    I found this article also very intriguing to read. This is a classic case of a double standard in our society today. According to our society it is alright for male as represented by George Clooney in this case, to “play the field” and have sex with who ever he wants when he wants. However if a woman as represented by Kim Kardashian is to “play the field” she is considered to be a slut who does not want to get married and have kids. I don’t agree with this double standard because men and woman should be treated the same no mater what the scenario. A man should not be praised for something a woman would be shamed.

  40. It’s not fair that single older men are still bachelors, but single older women are called humiliating names like spinster. It makes it seem like all that is important about a woman are her eggs, and makes it seem like women need men more than men need women.

    In my culture, older single women are called leftover women on the market. Older men are called golden bachelors. These are examples of inequality in every culture that we need to correct. This type of stereotype makes women feel nervous about aging and makes them fear their natural wrinkles and white hairs which are considered signals of wisdom. So we should get rid of the word spinster and call both single men and women the same.

  41. This article clearly demonstrates the obvious double standard in our society. How men can just search for a partner by sleeping with many women and be praised while if a woman does the same she is slut shamed. In this case, she would be called a spinster. Kim Kardashian should be able to set her bar high and find a mate who is worthy of her status similar to how men are able to choose hot women. There is tremendous pressure for women to get married while men are allowed to sleep around until they find the right person. The media shouldn’t broadcast Kim Kardashian being 30 and single as negative, but rather be a role model for women so they should wait until they find the right person. In the Persian culture, there is a term loosely translated as “damaged goods” which means if you are about 30 years old and still not married, there must be something wrong or “damaged” about you. This kind of thinking will only encourage women to rush into marriage and in fifty percent of cases leading to divorce.

  42. As a 20-year-old girl living in a Persian culture, I’m well aware of the double standard regarding men and women when it comes to marriage and dating. Men are allowed to sleep around and have fun until they need to settle down, while a woman needs to be prude and polite her entire life. I guess the same is true for all people, even Kim Kardashian and George Clooney. Although Kim’s claim to fame is sex tape, she should still be able to express herself sexually, date whoever she chooses and be single if she’d like to and not be considered some type of crazy, deprived and lonely woman. I find it interesting that the women George Clooney dates are never looked down upon for dating such a “bachelor,” but the men who date Kim are seen as taking the road extensively traveled, since she had dated so many men. I’m surprised the media doesn’t focus on Kourtney’s lack of marriage and two children born out of wedlock, since that seems to be more controversial than the number of men a woman over 30 has dated by society’s standards.

  43. Samina Abgin says:

    The moment i started reading this article i started thinking to myself, whats up with this double standard!? This double standard really needs to end. In the Persian culture that i have been raised in, by 30 a women should be married, educated and with a child. Why? who came up with this rule. Nowadays women should be free to make their own decisions without being judged. not every women wants to get married or have kids. The mans over 30? oh, its fine. The womens over 30? everyones panicking. Women also want to be independent, make money, and be able to stand on their own two feet. But when it comes to a man, not a word is said. All this pressure that is put on women to get married ends up in ugly divorces. Example Kim kardashian under the spotlight to get married just ended up being a wrong disastrous 72 day marriage. I think everyone would much rather see a happy women than watch a fake marriage and end up ruining a life.

  44. There is definitely a double standard with girls and guys when it comes to relationships.If guys are pimps and are sleeping with alot of girls they still do get negative sanctions from people such as girls and they are called man whores.They are also viewed as immature by many girls because all they do is sleep with a bunch of girls and dont want to have a deep relationship.Girls just get more criticism than men and they shouldn’t.They should be able to sleep with whoever they want and not get so much criticism.Society is made to be unfair towards women when it comes to subjects such as sex and women have to deal with it.The subject of Kim Kardashian still not married when shes over 30 is interesting.People do forget that she was married before,but it didnt workout.She has made a bad name for herself though and she sets the bar very high.Since she is also famous,some guys wouldnt want to be with her because the paparazzi will always be around them.People need to realize that the reason she isnt married is because she has alot of baggage and she did have a joke of a relationship with kim kardashian,where she cheated on him supposedly.Still women shouldnt be criticized for not being married at the age of 30+ because they may have just come off an ugly divorce,they may be focusing on their career too much,or they are still looking for the right guy.Relax with the pressure.

  45. As a frequent viewer of “Keeping Up With the Kardashians,” I am very familiar with Kim Kardashian and her current situation of being single. After reading this article, it made me realize that today’s society is very judgmental of unmarried women after a specific age and that if a woman is not following these norms, they are considered abnormal and looked down upon. However, I believe that there is nothing wrong with what Kim is doing. It is better for her to be patient and wait for someone she actually loves, rather than forcing herself into an unhappy marriage just because society says to do so. Kim is using her single status to her advantage by focusing on her career goals and what is important to her and I’m happy that she is embracing her freedom and independence rather than rushing and forcing herself into a marriage quickly. I also think that the fact that men can be single into their late ages and be considered independent, but women are judged and criticized immediately if they are not married before a certain age decided by society, is very unfair.

  46. Why are men always the ones who are already to have fun, and women are held on a pedestal of expectations? In our society women are constantly facing what is called the “Double Standard”. Men can go through countless or girls and sleep around, and they are just men. If a women sleeps around she is immediately labeled as a “slut”, “man-whore”, etc. In most cultures and societies there is a lot of pressure for women to get married and a certain age and have kids at a particular. Also there is pressure on who they marry. Kim Kardashian is a very successful woman, and not any man is good enough for her. The media is creating competition between Kim and her sisters. The media is also bashing the fact that Kim Karsashian and is still currently single. Even though Kim Karsdahian is not the best role model for women because she has now been married twice and divorced twice, she is still a successful woman in her 30’s unmarried. She is not allowing society and media to get to her.

  47. Why do people always expect that women over thirty are lonely and hopeless, but regard men over thirty as just being independent bachelors? Or, why is having a successful career seen as an obstacle for a women to get married, but a necessity for a man to get married? Also, why can men have high expectations for their spouses while women who do so are seen as picky? Ultimately, I think that the dubble standards in our society and the marital pressure that our society forces onto women are sickening. Women should be able to get married on their own terms, but sadly society does not allow us to do so.

  48. BrittanyP says:

    Because of media and how it has become the number one source of information, anyone can publish anything and readers will immediately absorb the information. From that, they will have certain views on different people, in this case; Kim Kardashian. I have watched her show a couple of times and she gives off the impression as a hard working, yet goofy woman. Being single at age 30 is not a big deal, especially when you have so much going on in your life. As of now, Kim is in a committed relationship, but STILL people tend to think of her as a “slut”. Im not sure if its because of her past or because she is still dating at the age of thirty, but whatever it is, the image of Kim that the media has planted in everyones head will most probably never changed no matter what she does. On the other hand, George Clooney has been portrayed as a very good looking middle aged bachelor. If George were a woman, comparing him and Kim Kardashian would be easy. He would obviously win as being sluttier because of how many relationships he has been in. Because he is a male- and because of how media embraces his good looks and wealth- the last category anyone would use to classify Clooney would be “Slut”.

  49. When Kim Kardashian just started to be shown in lime light, I thought of her as a piece of trash who does not deserve any time of social media fame simply through a stupid sex tape. As she started becoming bigger and bigger, I decided to watch her show and attempt to “keep up” with why and how she is getting all these ratings. As I got to understand her and more of her business savvy side, I began to appreciate her a little more and learn that through her dumb mistakes such as her sex tape or failed 72-day marriage, she has become a stronger and more independent person. As a 30 year old single lady, I would say she has gotten a lot done in her life than the generic female who is married and starting a family. We also have to keep in mind that marriage is not for everyone. Of course people are always talking about their fairytale wedding and what not, but at the same time, there are many women and men of course who do not believe that having a document stating that you are a married couple when it comes down to love. At the end of the day, love and compassion is what it comes down to…whether you love your career and want to continue making it grow, or love another being and want to create more life with them.

  50. The obvious double standard outlined in this article is well revisited and updated. Like the article suggests, spinsterhood is a modern take on the virginity double standard. Unlike the virginity double standard, however, it is actually a more pernicious double standard and a truer one. Spnsterhood is a label that is hard to shake, and it carries a variety of negative implications concerning unrestrained sexuality, female autonomy, and inclusion within the patriarchal community model.

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