Millions of people are faced with an unimaginable choice between taking care of a loved one or losing employment and healthcare benefits every day.
This month marks the 73rd month I’ve been a caregiver for my husband and the 61st month I’ve been a caregiver for my mother.
I am a care advocate and, more importantly, a 24-hour in-home caregiver for my husband who has Stage 5 kidney failure and my mother who is fighting a rare inflammatory disease. In 2024, I’ve spent more days in a hospital than at home. Not to mention being the mother to a phenomenally talented high school senior.
Being a full-time caregiver and a full-time employee means a lot of juggling. It means constantly putting others’ needs before my own. It means dashing from one appointment to another and a lot of time spent in ER waiting rooms, medical care center parking lots and hospital rooms. It means working crazy hours to accommodate a crazy amount of medical appointments. And it means deciding that sometimes work must be deprioritized to ensure I cover all of my caregiving responsibilities.
It’s a lot. All the time.
I’m incredibly grateful to work for an employer that understands there’s no such thing as work-life balance, a job that knows work or home will need to be prioritized at any moment. I’m thankful for a job that gives me the space and support I need to excel at home and work.
But because of my activist and professional work to win paid family and medical leave, paid sick and safe days and high-quality, affordable childcare for all, I am painfully aware that millions of workers have no access to paid time to care. For them, work-life balance is nothing more than a figment of a richer man’s imagination. Millions of people are faced with an unimaginable choice between taking care of a loved one or losing employment and healthcare benefits every day.
October marked National Work and Family Month, a month-long holiday promoting and celebrating accomplishments that make the workplace healthy, sustainable and more adaptable for everyone. These 31 days are dedicated to elevating the disconnect between capitalism and care and committing to making work environments better and more sustainable for everyone.
Give grace to yourself if you are a caregiver, and give grace to those you know are caregiving. That is one of the most underappreciated positions a person can be put in: learning new things, new reactions, new ways of living for yourself and others.
No one is prepared to become a caregiver, but at some point, we will either be a caregiver or we will need to be cared for. In a country without a federal paid leave program, caregivers like me have to decide if we go to work or stay home and take care of ourselves or a family member.
The time for a federal paid leave program is now, so we can all care for our families without losing employment and income.
Congress must pass the Healthy Families Act to guarantee workers earn up to seven paid sick and safe days every year. If passed, workers will be able to use paid time off for personal care and safety, family illness, to visit a doctor or to deal with the aftermath of domestic or sexual violence.
They must also pass the FAMILY Act, which would provide paid leave for all workers in America. The program will pool small contributions to guarantee that workers can draw wages while out on leave to care for a new child or a serious personal or family illness.
October’s National Work and Family Month has now transitioned to November: National Family Caregiver Month. The opportunity to prioritize care and caregivers continues for another month. I hope we realize that we have the power to create the society we need to care for ourselves and each other––without sacrificing our careers or losing our livelihoods.
